有些事情，
不是说放下就可以放下。
看见别人的 happy ending,
心永远都是酸的。
记忆太好，是对我最残忍的诅咒。
好像忘记，可是放不下。
永远都不相信自己，
永远都质疑我们的爱，
永远都乱想。
对不起，
我还是放不下，
我还是不能原谅自己。
对不起琪，对不起。

fuck February.. again

又回到一年前了。 这种狗屁事情，又发生了。 我干！

These emotions, ideas, and thoughts become powerful and real only when you become attached to them. When you are attentive to the moment at hand, that is when all those other things disappears. Your freedom and happiness will be determined by your ability to forgive and your ability to express loving-kindness through every deed and thought. To forgive yourself is perhaps the first step. Be good to yourself.

又是二月了

很想念你。

心酸

i know i shouldn't,

but i'd always think what could have been.

what would happen if i thought we weren't meant to be back then.

what would happen if i just ignored your text.

what would happen if your text was never received.

our choices are what brought us here today, 

but yet i still think about that one decision back then.

is it fair for me to put you through all these wait?

cause right now, this moment i am regretting my decision.

永远寂寞的诅咒，

没有人会比我更明白。

everyday, my heart dies a little.

its that time to avoid human contact again.

The best way to be happy is to be happy alone. Then, company will be a matter of choice, not necessity.

对不起，是我自私。

每当我怕的时候，

总是求你不要走。

虽然我明白，

要你等，要你受苦，

对你是很不公平。

对不起，我骗了你。

对不起，我又哭了。

那该死的感觉,又回来了。
可能我是注定,永远不会幸福快乐。
可能永远都不会有人,
打开我心里这把锁。
可能永远都不会有人了解我。
可能永远都一个人。

好希望有人会在看我的部落格。

变，是人的本性。

那感觉，
又回来了。
心疼，
也随着一起来。

You are free to leave.
Doesn't mean i will stop loving you.

You don't deserve forgiveness.
Not yet.

You can't get away, the past, they will always find a way to catch up to you.

All i see are ghost. 

Everywhere i turn, i see ghosts. 

The ghosts from my past.